Sometimes a Heart Can’t Afford to Be Just Friends

Click on the above image to peep the tweet which says,
“Sometimes a heart can’t afford to be just friends.”

My general rule is that if I am uncomfortable, I won’t do it.

I been number one AND number two before.

Number dos is bad for your self esteem IF YOU really want
the top spot. I was a kid then when I did that shit. I’m grown now.

Saw this tweet and thought it was remarkable, given the
“can we be friends” or “can you have friends” terrain I have
be walking lately. Ummp. Ummm. Ummp.

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happening.

My momma say, “Good things come to those who wait,
just don’t wait too long.”

Phonte’s Just Friends

Amy Winehouse <<Just Friends track.

Became anyone’s “friend” lately?

Had to make someone a “friend”?

Ummmp.

Comments

  1. deelight says

    uggggggggh. hit ’em with the uncomfortable truths, first thing in the morning. YES.. been riding that “i know i SHOULD be number one, but we’re pretending to do that ‘justfriends'” thing for the last few months. it’s making me confused.. i want to do my thing, i want him to do his.. but i also wanna be numero uno. double standards, much?!

    how to resolve… trying to live, be loving, be patient, act with grace and abundance. shit is hard.

  2. admin says

    Yeah. Who you telling, I met a jawn, Slow Dynamite, thought he was going to be my “friend.” 4 days of kicking it later, I caught feelings,now I am like Ummmm. The HELL that happen.

    I need to be honest w/ myself and have some discipline and make my choice. Choices don’t get made for futuristic black girls in #2010.

    Lesson: Don’t ever ASSUME that you will or will not have chemistry w/ someone or that you care capable of being “just friends”..upon meeting because shit….2 dinners, connect four and a study/food/boom bap session later. Somebody MIGHT be pressed, ie ME. Lols.

    Ummm hmmm. Live and learn. Umm hmmm.

  3. beababy says

    It’s a send off if one of the two people know that they want more but settle for just being friends. its cool when yall kickin’ it and spending time, all in the name of friendship, but when you wanna express those “otha” feelings thats when the conflict (usually internal) starts. to minimize suffering, the infamous “keep it real” will suffice… be honest and call a spade a spade

  4. says

    @Beababy….
    Yeah….Calling spades takes courage and vulnerability…What I am learning tho…is that connections are rare AND…shit needs to take time happen….AND no and yes are awesome words…but not reflecting on shit is the devil.

    I am actually a waay more open to shit poppin’ off. Like I said it takes time…Plus I got hella busy…so my mind was like wait…THAT WAS a good time and I want to do it again WHEN I have the time.

    Looking forward to 3/30/10 Erykah! Yes.

  5. beababy says

    i feel that. i am actually in a unique position now where i’m learning that true love and being in a relationship are two totally different things, as oft time in relationships there are expectations, versus pure love that have no conditions, limits, or expectations at all. however its beautiful when the two merge organicly (sp)anyhoo, whatever it is, enjoy!

  6. john says

    At what point in life do we not settle for the 2 spot? Is it at anypoint or is it when we are grown in a space of knowing who we are and what we want? I think we accept the 2 spot hoping to take first place if that isn’t your goal your shooting low and should never have played the game! But, I understand sometimes we just want to be in but what usually happens is you get in but standing by the door isnt enough anymore you want vip status! LOL Then the confusion steps in and your not sure what your doing there in the first place. And GOD forbid if LOVE actually blossoms. You cant fight the heart for your sure to lose some kind of way, so you have to be prepared for what comes along sometimes you cant though and LIFE TKO’s you on the sneak and leaves you with your head in your palms wonder what the hell happened! LOVE,LIVE…LIFE!!

  7. admin says

    Is it at anypoint or is it when we are grown in a space of knowing who we are and what we want?
    ========
    Yessir. Discipline and courage helps in doing this.

  8. says

    Ever have a friend break your heart? You waited so long, you even became best friends and things still didn’t flourish? It’s happened to me and I believe God was trying to tell me something and I finally listened in Dec of 2009. After almost 3 years of crying everytime he had someone “new” and still trying to be the supportive friend who wanted him to be happy, it was a hellish monotony that I couldn’t quit. Then a remarkable event happened that tore my heart to pieces. I cut off all communication with him. I haven’t spoken to him since, I knew that if I did speak with him again, I’d go back into my “another chance” mode and be struck with heartache. I had a very major case of clarity once the ties were cut. He knew what our “friendship” was like, that it could’ve benefited from being on a higher level, yet, God’s plans ain’t nothing to mess with. So, I had to fall back.

  9. admin says

    Girrrrrrrrrrrrrl. [This] God?s plans ain?t nothing to mess with. So, I had to fall back.

    ===========
    Im a stuborrn negro. But I try and have a soft heart and open ears, so I can listen.
    Discipline is a mug tho. Spiritual discipline that is.

    Congratulations on clearing your path. Nothing quite like it.

  10. tamilchick says

    I was recently tossed. Thought we were vibing to the same beat for a few months. One night of vulnerability changed it all for him. Then come to find out it was never what I thought it was. Hard pill to swallow. I guess “fearless and vulnerable” is what you say….

  11. admin says

    So long as you learned something from it, you good money.

    Today, was the first in A long time, that I walked completly in the moment, w/ the understanding
    the something was around the corner waiting for me, and when I was ready, they will show up.

    Real spit. I wish the same for you Love. Just being content with what is, as opposed to focusing
    on what ain’t.