lil kim

Speaking to Jonzey Saturday I brought up the video of Regis touching Nicki’s behind on Live with Regis and Kelly (@1:42 sec). Listen to him say “looks like you are wearing a little strap there.” #sideeye

Jonzey responded saying, “I have thoughts about it, and they are different from yours.” Isn’t it awesome when your friends ALREADY BE KNOWING your arguments?

She argued that because Nicki Minaj holds herself out there as a sexual object, with hyper cartoonish hair colors and provocative clothing, then she will be treated like a sexual object.

I bit my lip and thought, she is right I disagree.

So I responded, wait, that same rationale is used to justify raping women. The argument goes, well, she is a ho, she wasn’t wearing panties, she asked to be raped. Jonzey said it wasn’t analogous. She is right, it ISN’T analogous, but the thinking is the same in that it places responsibility on the person acting, not the recipient of a non consensual touch.

I then asked her about the Adrian Brody kissing Halle Berry at the Oscars. She said, no that wasn’t the same because of how Halle holds herself out there.

She then brought up Diana Ross fondling Kim’s breast at at the VMA’s in 1999, 11 years ago.

And I asked if that was analgous to Regis touching Nicki and she said yes.

I bit my tongue.

Then finally said, “Girrlllllllllll. You know Imma have to write about this conversation. You know I don’t agree with you about this. I routinely get treated like a sex worker in the streets, especially in the summer time.”

I continued, “No one has the right to touch me, unless I consent to it, regardless of what I am wearing. That goes for Nicki and Kim or whomever.”

Besides, historically Black women have been seen, as a result of the ideologies of slavery as “Natural Ho’s” and most of rap music nor representations of Black women as hypersexual or invisible or as mammies certainly hasn’t helped in terms of refuting this.

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So um no.

Regis wrong.

Adrian Brody wrong.

Diana Ross wrong.

Don’t touch me/us.

Full stop.

Oh and for more context. Peep this old post “Buffy the Body is Venus Hottentott.”

Moya wrote about this too @ Crunkfeminists.

Women’s Media Center sent out a open letter to Regis. One paragraph caught my eye,

“A highly toxic media environment and sexual harassment in workplaces, streets, and public spaces is a daily reality for women in the United States. Sexual objectification and harassment in the media injures individual women and perpetuates this climate.”

You see the video?

What do you think?

Do women who hold themselves out as sexual beings invite and consent to being touched?

If yes, do Black men, by virtue of being born Black and Male invite and consent to being touched by police?

There is something sorely missing from hip hop. Hip hop is missing the the voice of a woman that is sexual, raw and self possesed. A woman who has created and stays in her lane and is clearly unapolgetic about who she is.

I usta be scared of the d*ck/
now I throw my lips on the sh*t/
handle it like a real b*tch/.

“Asserting herself sexually like a hip-hop Millie Jackson, Kim’s ribald accounts of healthy sexual appetite come off as empowering,” said Time Out. “Kim is a revolutionary figure in the sense that she’s a woman who is articulating the same perverted thoughts that men have been rhyming about for years,” said CMJ in their “Dope!”-rated review. Spin concurred, stating “Lil’ Kim is possessed of so much natural panache and audacity that she packs the attack of a 50-foot woman.”

The New York Times article on surban mommas pole dancing to add spice to their lives reminds me of kim and the schizophrenic realtionship that this country has with sex.

Pole dancing, once exclusively the province of exotic dancers, has flared up as a much-hyped Hollywood exercise craze, and has seeped into the collective unconscious through shows like ?The Sopranos? and ?Desperate Housewives.? A variant called motorized pole dancing, which occurs in stretch limos, has raised eyebrows as far away as Britain, where some female university students pole-danced as a fund-raiser for testicular cancer. And mini-poles have even been spotted as dance props at over-the-top bat mitzvah parties in suburban precincts.

My first problem with the article is that it presupposes that suburban mommas are not suppose to be mashing in the first place.

Secondily.

In our culture, Strippers are lower than spit.

So what does it means when “Surban” re responsible and lady like and not sexual women start “pole dancing” for fun.

Its serves as evidence of “stripper culture” permeating mainstream culture without any analysis of what it means to be a woman that makes her living off selling the notion of sex, the fantasy of sex, and for that matter sex.

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?I want the women to feel strong within themselves,? explained Ms. Cottam, 29, who teaches pole dancing at a local gym as well as at home parties. Noting that some middle-aged suburban women lose themselves and their sense of sexuality as they are consumed by the responsibilities of motherhood, she added: ?When you come to my class you are beautiful, you are. I want to show them that strength inside, and unleash that sexual kitten.?

Think about it. The Duke rape case was largely scandless because the accuser was a black woman, EXOTIC DANCER, momma and student.

Kim will never be Kim again.

With jail, the loss of of Biggie and the cosmetic surgeries, life is different for Kim.

However, I remember reading her article in Honey magazine and feeling like I knew her and being glad that she existed.

Hip Hop needs her voice.

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Good Morning Blog Family. Did you see the snow last night? It was purrrrty. It actually made me relax. And that was after two cups of coffee, a cinnamon roll, an 4 hours of reading, lol.

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