As many of you know, my brother is one of my most favorite people in the world. He is funny, handsome, has a dark sense of humor think “Black Mike Judge” meets Richard Pryor. Lastly he is extremely charming and tries to be there for momma. As a Black working dad who tries to participate in his children’s lives as much as possible he keeps me grounded in many ways.
As of late, we have been having beef, Why? His anger and how he expresses it.
Now we have been known to dance around our mutual disagreements. Dude is an avid Mike Savage listener. I kid you not.
He would say something anti-immigrant, or homophobic. And I would decide whether or not to engage with him.
If it was a “not engage” I would be like “blood, Imma call you tomorrow, because clearly you are on personality number 252 and I need number 28 today, later”. And that would be that.
If it were an “engage” I would be like “what do you mean by that?” We have blown up at each other, made up, etc.
Well, as of late I have been insistent about him raging at me about shit he does not like in his life, mainly his love bear who he often refers to as “bitch assed bitch” when he is upset. This can be twice, three times a week. o.O
Now deep in my heart, I knew I was going to have to account for this. Meaning I knew that the vitriol he directed at her was going to come my way. How could it not?
It hurts when standing up for yourself means having less communication with someone you Love.
However, God did not put me here to be someone’s (auditory) rug.
Words can be Love. Words can do Violence.
If they don’t do violence, let a white person call a Black person a “nigger” publicly and see what happens. (And honestly, I historically do not spell out the B word, BUT because of my contention with rap blogs and how they will SHOW women’s bodies but not type out the B word or the N word. Really. Sounds like corporate sponsor bullshit to me).
I hope that my brother is able to see that I am standing up for myself on principal. Even if he doesn’t I have to.
I will call for Thanksgiving, if I am up to it, or Christmas for sure. Other than that, I am all set until I am spoken to like a human being.
I am not an object and neither is he. #LovenAndChangeareAlwaysPossible.